Welkin Blue

Coaching For Confidence, Health and Wellbeing

Month: September 2016

What It Means To Be Confident



Contrary to popular belief, being confident has nothing to do with how loud, extrovert, or socially dominant you are.   It also has nothing to do with displays of ‘Alpha’ behaviour, or being the centre of attention.   In fact such obvious behaviour is often an example of classic overcompensation when the opposite is true.

In reality, Confidence is simply self-acceptance.   It’s about genuinely not allowing the opinion of others to affect you in a negative manner.   Because confident people live by their own values, don’t conform to any arbitrary standard, and refuse to measure themselves against others.

You can be quiet, introvert, thoughtful, deep, or anything really; and still be extremely confident.   Because confidence gives you resilience.   It means you don’t need to control your environment to feel safe, because you know you are a resourceful person, a survivor who can overcome anything.

Confidence means you neither fear what other people think, nor waste your energy endlessly second-guessing yourself. You can show a healthy respect for differing views, but have the courage to follow your own path.

Confident people are generous towards others because their personal identity is not based upon being better than anyone else, and they see no profit from the misery of others.

Confident people are able to achieve real inner peace, by not allowing themselves to be defined by the world around them.   In fact they navigate their lives, career and relationships, with an air of grace that enables them to get the best out of every opportunity.

You can be this person, and I can help.

How to be a Confident Communicator



Being a confident, effective communicator isn’t just about what you say.   It’s not about shouting to be heard, or talking over others to drive your point home.   Neither is it anything to do with rehearsed lines and competing for attention.

Good communicators do none of these things as they have clarity about the message they want to convey.   It ties in with their core identity, and how they interact with the world around them.   Not just in terms of what they say, but in how they carry themselves.

Because communication is far more than verbal expression, and has more to do with how you process and understand the endless stream of information you take in via your senses, each and every day.   Making sense of your ‘world’ allows you to find your ‘place’ within it.   Consequently, this understanding gives you the capacity to communicate with purpose, because you know what your overriding ‘story’ is.

This is empowering stuff, as you no longer feel pressured into talking for the sake of it. What you choose to communicate is considered, thoughtful, and self-aware. In fact you’re now able to communicate an air of confidence without saying a single word; as your actions, and the way you hold yourself, say it all.

Effective communication begins with the ability to listen to others, to hear what they say, and understand what it means to them.   Good communicators know this, they don’t rush to say their piece, and take time to build rapport.   This ensures their message is received and understood.   In fact some of the best communicators I’ve ever met, are quiet, thoughtful people who prefer to sit back and take everything in. But when they do have something to say, it’s always worth hearing.

All this translates into a powerful ability to go after what you want without being afraid to do so.   It puts others on notice as to who you are, and how you expect to be treated.   You never have to justify yourself, as your core message is consistent, embedded at an identity level, and a true reflection of who you are.

Communication at this level has a massive impact on your confidence, boosts your self-belief, and clears your mind of unnecessary clutter.

Ready to take the journey?

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